Angry II

Cordova Hospital / Wellcome Images

Cordova Hospital / Wellcome Images

At my rehab hospital, the nurses had a name for a particular brand of patient: “STB,” for Stupid Teenage Boy. The hospital tended to get more of these during the summer, when school let out. I had my stroke in the summer, so I had a prime seat to this phenomenon. For example, there was a guy, drunk with friends in a beach town, thought it would be funny if he jumped off a trolley while it was still moving. So he jumped…and landed on his head. I was annoyed at him, because he could have avoided everything — hospital, therapy —  if he had not been an STB.

I’m not angry at him anymore.

Have you ever been angry at a fellow patient?



One Response to “Angry II”

  1. xina writes:

    My situation is different from yours – at 35 I presented with and was ultimately diagnosed (after almost a year of rigorous medical testing) with a progressive, degenerative neuromuscular disease.
    I have never found myself angry at other people for their situations (such as people who have lung cancer from smoking for example), but I have been plenty angry at myself. While my illness is not genetic and has no known cause, I have beaten myself up plenty for all of the things I did in my life that may or may not have contributed to my getting this horrible disease. Is it because I smoked for almost 20 years? Is it because I did drugs when I was in college? Is it because I used to binge drink? Is it because I ate so much junk food as a teenager and young adult? Is it because I lived in NYC, including an apartment where they sprayed pesticides monthly? I even go back to my birth – is it because I was born premature and was sickly when I was born? The irony is I know people who have also done any or all of these things and they do not have the illness that I have. Many of them have no illness at all. It is still extraordinarily difficult not to blame myself. Of course, ultimately, this gets me nowhere and does nothing in any kind of way to help me cope with or manage my reality. There are many stupid people in the world. Too many. And life is unfair. Take comfort in knowing that you, unlike the STBs, are not responsible for what happened to you.

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