Romance

Lovers / Library of Congress

Lovers / Library of Congress

Several people have written in asking advice on dating when you are disabled. I was very disabled at first after my stroke and dating was terribly hard. My advice is to date a lot, kind of like a job search. Online dating is your friend. All you need is one amazing person who thinks you are amazing too.

Other advice?

3 Responses to “Romance”

  1. Emma writes:

    Online dating is my friend???? Are you kidding! That malarky is painful! However I have been playing with it and kinda just started seeing someone from that world. Wish me luck!

  2. kent writes:

    I am not disabled, so I can’t speak from experience. But dating is for most people an awkward thing; having a disability compounds that. But the same advice applies: if you’re able to be your best, honest self, it will work. Or it won’t — one has to expect that it will take a while to meet someone you’re truly compatible with and attracted to.

    I think as a disabled person, the fact of your disability will weed out people for whom the disability is a problem. They’re no one you want to open yourself up to anyway. But people are people, which means that there will people who will see you, disability and all, and like you for you.

  3. Emma writes:

    That’s the part I have a hard time with Kent. With online dating at what point do I disclose my disability? My practice has been not to do it in my online profile. While chatting online I let them know there is something but I’ll discuss it in person. It’s easy to get to in person because I pitch up with a cane and leg brace. And every line of chat leads there. I din’t work; din’t drive; go ti bed early every night. I find it easiest to give the reason for all that. I mistly never made it to a second date.i never know if that’s me, my disability or the guy. I find the while process difficult and hard on my self esteem but U’m trying. By the way I’m divorced cuz the loser bauled on me while I was in the hospotiak probably leading ti some of my insecurities about trusting men and relationshios.

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